For the record, I was gonna start this out with an old, saggy skin joke...then immediately started dryheaving so I scrapped the idea. Hugh Hefner is getting married for what has to be the 29384789237th time in his life, to a girl (Crystal Harris) that's young enough to be his great-granddaughter. (I just dryheaved again for the record.)

Apparently they're getting married on New Year's Eve and already got their marriage license. Mind you, they were already going to be married once before Crystal pulled the parachute cord 5 days before the wedding.

Anyone else feel like all the Playmates take turns because dating/marrying Hef is like playing the lottery? Their mindset HAS to be like "Oh he looks like he's on his way out -- now is a good time to marry him and try to win his fortune."

Props to Hef though -- he's the only 86-year-old man that can grab a 20-something girl's bum and NOT be called Grampy Bad Touch.